I like flying commercial.

It gets frustrating sometimes. Long lines, too short transfer times and the fact that airplanes eat my cell phones all put a damper on my fun quotient. For some reason, though, I still like it. I like the expensive crappy food. I like the feeling of takeoff. And I sleep like a baby in those narrow, cramped seats.

There’s another reason for me to like to fly. Since I fly out of Denver International Airport, the more I fly, the better the chances that I’ll be under those huge white pavilions when the world ends. When the Illuminati who really control the world take their refuge in the sixth underground level of the caverns beneath the Airport, I’ll just knock on their door. How could they refuse a guy with my disarming smile?

That’s right folks, it’s Way-out Wednesday, and today’s expose is a doozy. Before we take one more step, refresh your memory of this disclaimer:

DISCLAIMER: I make no guarantees about the accuracy (or lack thereof) of any of these posts, but true believers (or virulent skeptics) are welcome to discuss politely in the comments. Below statements do not represent my beliefs (necessarily), nor are they meant as an endorsement of any sort by Wingman NewsWire (unless I specifically say so).

It’s legally binding.

So what on earth am I talking about? Just this.

If you can’t be bothered to read the whole thing, here’s an overview:

Denver International Airport may or may not be run by the Illuminati, child-eating reptile-resembling aliens or a more sinister organization.

Why? Because it’s:

A: The largest airport in the United States (bigger than San Francisco proper).
B: The site of a mural which shows three dead minority women: a Native American, an African American woman, and a Jewish woman.
C: Has a network of fiber optic (not counting plain copper wire) cable that is longer than the Nile River.
D: The inside is supposedly invisible to infrared and RADAR detection.
E: Reportedly has 8 subbasements (who needs EIGHT basements?)
F: Is “the most inconvenient airport in America”, ranked by its distance from Denver proper.

And the Big One….

That’s a MASONIC SYMBOL that you see there, folks, with what looks like a KEYPAD above it! The entrance to the super secret catacombs?

One can only hope. Here’s a closer image.

Note the title beneath the date: New World Airport Commission. I rest my case.

That’s it for this week, folks! Here’s a compendium of links for further information:

“An Open Letter to the New World Order Denver Airport”
An article from Westword on the subject.
An almost reasonable account of the conspiracy.

Keep digging, and always- if you come across a conspiracy that you think needs airing, you can send it to me.

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